Orge, just leave me be

This is going to be saddening, will cause multiple ______-insert anything that depicts gloom.

I know it's rare for a second update so soon but my fingers feel like dancing, so leave them be. There are many things in life we could leave it be, like sometimes we lose a penny, we leave it be because we have the knowledge it's just a penny. It'll turn up anytime now, or I'll earn it back somehow. Whenever you disappoint your parents, you chose to leave it be because you also have the knowledge that for all your life, you'll be living and breathing disappointing your parents in many aspects in your life not just with the bad grades, like what I got for maths and science but also choices like piercing my tongue, contemplating on a naval piercing and scolding fuck in front of them not to them. Leave it be, it's a seductive crime. Many times in life we chose to pour whatever troubles we have to the old debt and tell ourselves, we'll leave it to another day to settle them for I'm tired today. And that's a heinous crime, sure you guys heard it all before. Time waits for no man.

I know you guys are longing for a platform where I speak about what happened to me and YinHui so I thought today when my senses are clear, when my feelings are depictable, when I feel like sharing, I shall.

Many have been concerned about what happened between the both of us. For all who did by asking me, Thank you. For those that live and breathed on rumours, Fuck off.

There are many times in life I didn't put in effort to salvage a crumbling friendship, where the remains of what's virtually there stays on the edge of the gallows. This isn't one of THOSE TIMES. In life, you lose some, you gain some. Some friends I lose cause I held too much pride, some because we drift, and the more common ones because of a big quarrel and sad to say, what happened between me and YinHui can't be catergorised under any of which. What happened was, even till now, sudden and indescribable.

Even you say Ching is the reason I'll tell you to fuck yourself cause that wasn't true. YinHui likes Ching, I like Ching too. So if we both like Ching, how can Ching be the reason? In case many haven't noticed, YinHui is closer to Ching nowadays. Maybe it was the jealousy that was bubbling up but hey! I got jealous of YinHui with her bitches before but I don't see the same ending. We didn't feel shortchanged on trust, and that's not even a probable explanation since the feeling has always been mutual. Just like what YinHui said, there's no real explanation so yeah, I guess there's no big stories for you to elaborate on after what's been said and done.

It's been some time since everything was the same and how I would like to lie at the field in front of my house right now, kneel to God and beg him to tip me into the emotional time machine. But, do you think that will really happen? I have been trying to pick up the pieces, been trying and is still trying to pull everything together before Earth crumbles under me. It takes two to tango, two hands to clap, two cars to crash and with Eunice, it's only one. If you still love me, reciprocate. I didn't spend 6fucking months with you just to distinguish the love. Like what Ghandi would say, Reignite the flame! I'm trying baby, so please flow with me. It takes a little effort from the both of us. Before time ingrains in our faces, take this as a patronisation from the devils, give it a go, we'll still be what you wanted us to be.

ps, you used to say you love me with all your heart and I did too. Please prove to me now and can't lose you.