Do people live for themself or for the sake of others?

The clubber fever, which, acutally sucked. It was a mockery dancing with them because they kept introducing me to malay guys. I'm do not have a problem grooving with malay guys(contradictory to what diy believes) but for that night I could really do with a guy that could speak chinese/hokkien. Although prolly most of the time they will realise I'm smiling, I can't speak chinese or pronounce hokkien words correctly for nuts! It's bad to club without your homie (YinHui<3333). You'll just end up dancing with the floor or start playing with your 10 fingers. So when the night was still young, I dialled for my brother for a quick way home, and rushed back home with RnB blasting in a speeding car. I couldn't even hear myself scream when he swerved from one car to another.

I'll try to put up my brother's girlfriend picture soon. Everybody behold, she's one beauty for the feast of your eyes but when you search for her brain, you'll find nothing there. She's pretty brainless, if you've gotta know.

CA1 is just over and everybody is starting to party. What happened to O levels?! So many stuffs comin' up. And I just can't believe that I'll be reaching 16 soon!(in 7 months time) Especially when I still like to cry and whine so much. Can somebody wake me up please?

We'll do the clubber fever again, and this time you'll see the sweat rollin'.

life is cynical :-l

You know, I was looking through my old stuffs just a minute ago and found a letter I wrote to this guy but just didn't have the courage to get it sent out. It was such a bad timing to find the letter because when I opened it, it was sending signals of regrets and it's just 1day after valentines. I shouldn't be subjected to such a treatment, but I guess it's a gentle reminder of what I can do with some love in my life. I couldn't believe that 2 years ago, when I was still on the verge of being a delinquent, I could actually write such a mushy letter and I was practically obsessed with this guy. I wrote down every single little thing of him that made me smile to myself like some little girl in love.

When I think of how dumb I was 2 years back, I really wish that I could buy an air ticket back to the past and not break the heart I was holding in my bare hands. Zooming in today, he's happy and I am too. But what if he was with me today, will I be happier? Life is such a cynic.

Next year valentine's, I'm going to try and find a guy worthy of my love. But if I can't, I'll just buy marshmallows and stuff myself dead.


xoxo, goh jia yi

A little of this, a little of that

A month has passed and I still feel pretty much like how I did when I first entered 2009. A little lost and a little scared. Maybe in time to come I'll be a little bruised but if that really happens, I won't be here. I'll be hiding in a corner waiting for the world to end. If anyone finds me cooped up on my little bed, please give me a little push. Because I think I just lack a little faith.

I'll end it here because I still have to go read up on how plants have sex, reproduce and have kids which in turn have more sex and reproduces more kids. For now, let's just say, the plants leads a more interesting life than I do.

I'm tired, but for you, I'll find the will to live.